My Daughter Is 10yrs Old And She Cannot Tell When She Needs To Poo Which Causes Her To Have To Change 4 Or 5 Times A Day Which Is Really Hard When Shes At School. Could Someone Please Help?

I am really sorry to hear that this is happening to your daughter - it must be very tough on her.  My daughter now 12 had a similar problem but not to the same extent - but it would seem that she would get so involved in what she was doing that she would some how not register that she needed to poo or wee and kept having accidents night & day until she was about 10. She still wets the bed at night.  When she was 8-9 years old it turned out that she was being severely bullied at school and this was contributing to her disappearing into herself and not caring what happened to her.  We removed her from that school & I brought her to a paediatrician, who then recommended that she be assessed for Aspergers.  She does have Aspergers and once we had the diagnosis life didn't get easier but we (she & I) started to understand why she kept having accidents, didn't notice her bodies demands (still doesn't but with reminders,written & verbal, she is learning to manage the demands of her body), her own body odour, other peoples facial expressions & tone of voice etc.  When she couldn't,& often still can't understand what is happening around her she will become more stressed and disappear into herself and the bedwetting and poo accidents & body odour and apparent refusal to respond increase.  It is very difficult and painful for both child and parent but with patient understanding from mum (which can be really hard) and helping her understand the signs of what it feels like to need to poo or wee the accidents became less frequent.  We had to write some of this stuff down and often I had to go over the signs of needing to poo/wee upward of 15 times a day - but we are getting there & she rarely poos her pants anymore.  I really suggest you take your daughter to a paediatrician specialising in behavioural disorder who works with a well recognised childrens hospital.  They may refer you on to a behavioural specialist or to a specialist in physical disfunctions.  Hang in there, it is really hard but with your support and love you can help your daughter manage this distressing  problem. Hard times are ahead, but be calm, stick with your daughter, keep listening to her, trust your instincts and try and get her assessed. A diagnosis isn't always concrete but it helps give you a way forward to help your daughter. Blessings to both you and her. Try not to blame her or yourself for this situation, cry if you need to but let her know you always have her back and that might alleviate some of the stress around this for her (it doesn't necessarily stop your stress but you know fake it til you make it!) Best wishes and I send you my support in this.  If you would like to email for some support as a mother to another mother just submit your answer and I will email you. Regards D