First off, Welcome Sane Mori and goodbye, Aru Akise... I like you better like this. You're kinder, gentle even.
Than you for your thought provoking question. Truth is, I'm finding out new stuff about myself everyday. I'm no expert, even when it comes to me.... I'm scared that when I do find out who I am, I won't like the person inside...
It depends how we define "self understanding". I guess I've pretty much understood myself for a long time, I always know what I wanna do & always having plans.
I know who I am & what I wanna do & which path I need to follow.
Having a circle of principles that I live by them. Sometimes they get updated by living through.
I've largely worked out the who and the why and, in retrospect, I can see who I was. I don't think we ever see ourselves as clearly as we appear to others.
We all have a Dr Jekyll living inside but there's a Mr Hyde, too. He has a strong, sometimes selfish, often unfriendly personality and life can be a struggle between the two. With hindsight it's possible to work out how our personal Jekyll and Hyde developed, but it's sometimes difficult to decide which of them truly represents us.
When Don Quixote was compelled to see himself in a mirror it was too much for him. Perhaps total clarity -- the ability to see ourselves as others see us -- would be too much for most of us.
"Understand" ? Probably not.
We are complex beings .. And though a lot of our behaviour, action and reaction can be somewhat affected by our previous experiences...It's not an exact science.
God no! I can't even understand why people around me behave the way they do. I sure as heck don't know why I'm the way that I am. I don't know why I like what I like or why I hate what I hate. I just do.
Yeah, no. I don't think I ever will. Randomness all around. It will either take another person to understand me and tell me, or I will have to leave on a 40 year pilgrimage somewhere in the Himalayas.
For very personal reasons, yes I understand myself. It's been a long, slow journey. I am still learning all the time. The process was hard. Accepting myself for who I am, having the courage to make changes when I learned something new. Learning to like, then love myself. In my case I had to do it for my children to stop the decades long cycle of abuse and dysfunction. A lot of things that I found scared me, but facing those things and accepting them as a part of who I am was freeing. The end result is a person with a very peaceful mind. It was worth it.
I see my shrink every two months. I think I'm sane compared to some of these nut cases I'm bi polar but I don't kill anyone or animals I don't sit in traffic for six hours a day, so who is sane?
I do for the most part. And because I do, I realize why I have done things in the past that I am not proud of. The thing about understanding yourself, it gives you the opportunity to change and not let the things that were bothering you before to continue to run your life.
You could still be Aru, just answer for yourself. Sane Mori is an oc, correct? :)
As for your question. Like Ty, I am working to figure myself out too... Have you truly figured yourself out? There are some things I have figured out about me that I don't like. Like you, they scare me to death.
Turn your TV, music and phone off (doesn't mean you cannot meet up with friends), and internet and you will find out who you are.
Yep ... I do.
It is not my fault that I am who I am. Past experiences and the motions of atoms within my brain make sure all of that is determined without any input from me. Of course, who is me?
Do we get to be us? Or do we just get to observe ourselves from a poorly defined vantage point?
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