Anonymous

A friend's brother committed suicide. Now she's depressed, and she's been dropping lines like: "Maybe one day I'll just never wake up." and "Sometimes life is too hard." What do I do?

7

7 Answers

Virginia Lou Profile
Virginia Lou answered

Dear Anonymous,

At some point you are just relying on your intuition in such situations... But consider really addressing/responding to her intimations...

* * *

"The world cannot afford to be without you...we cannot lose your brother and then you too..."

"No...you really must wake up in the morning. You are too beautiful, now is not your time, and we need for you to continue."

"Yes life can be very very difficult, and I need for you to stick it out."

"I believe in you, you can call me anytime, and why don't we go for a walk/ride/movie/ice cream right now?"

Yin And Yang Profile
Yin And Yang answered

She is expressing feelings. You need to listen and not speak. Just be "there." She will flock to you in her grief cuz you will feel "safe" to her. I agree with Jan, let her parents know to keep an eye on her.

Kidddas WG Profile
Kidddas WG answered

hold hands with her and tell her "I'm sorry for ur loss"

tell her that u care about her.

Arthur Wright Profile
Arthur Wright , Florida Paralegal with a BS degree in Social-Psychology, answered

Actually unless youre trained in Psychology in the area of handling suicides and effects on those around us, there is very little you can do but be a good friend and listen.  From many years of experience dealing with suicides I can tell you that most people who actually talk about it wont do it but its the silent depressed people who usually will without warning.  Now if she would like to talk to someone impartial here, I will be more than glad to help your friend thru this but totally up to you guys and just let me know on here or thru my message. In the meantime, don't try to offer advise as you could accidentally or unintentionally set your friend off and if you fear you friend is getting worse here, notify Parents or a school Counselor or even Police but tell someone  and let them handle this.  Good luck and I am here to help you too if you need it

Anonymous Profile
Anonymous answered

Thank you so much, everyone.  I'm so scared about my friend.  Her brother and I were really good friends, and one day he just didn't come to school anymore.  I made a really stupid mistake, and asked my friend where she and her brother had been.  (She took a few days off because of a funeral, etc.)  She burst into tears and didn't talk to me for a few days.  I knew that something was wrong, so I didn't try to push any communication, or texting or anything.  I found out from her cousin that her brother had committed suicide.  Shortly after I found this out, she started texting me about her suicidal thoughts.  I went to a school councilor, but I didn't take her along with me, because I didn't want to ask her too much about it.  The school councilor said she would keep an eye on my friend.  I'm just so afraid that one day she'll stop coming to school too.  Thank you so much for helping me!

AnnNettie Paradise Profile

Family members and friends want to do the right thing for the one who has lost hope. Of course, it will not help to use expressions such as: “Stop feeling sorry for yourself,” “A lot of people are worse off than you are” or, “All of us have a bad day now and then.” Instead, why not be a real friend and a good listener? Yes, try to help the despondent one to see that life is worth living.


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